Indirect Speech

(A Rhyme)

Indirect speech

Is a pain in the pratt.

Do you mean “this?”

Or do you mean “that?”

Tell it to me straight my friend.

Don’t make me have to guess.

I’m lazy and I’m uninvolved.

Don’t tell me “more is less.”

Don’t make me have to use my brain,

Smell academic stink.

I’m in a rush. Must meet my goals.

Can’t take the time to think.

Can’t call you back. Too busy now.

No time to send a text.

You’ve caused me pain. It sounds insane

But I have to know “what’s next.”

Oh, save your tropes and similes

And what’s a metaphor?

Artistic complication? Give it up.

I’m keeping score.

One plus one is always two.

No twists. No turns, okay?

So, if you want to talk to me:

Have something straight to say!